Wonder

"The Wonder of it All"

"Jake, do you know why this orange juice tastes so good? (My 6 year old son asks his 9 year old brother.) Cuz, there are little bits of me in it!!" What? "Yeah, when we opened up the can I licked the orange pulp!"

Don’t you love it when your kids converse like that? When you get to hear their own unique interaction. Get to see their budding bond. Praying, hoping even through all the daily fights and rivalry that they indeed will grow to be strong friends. There for one another all of their lives.

Our two boys are incredibly precious. Just tonight, Conor has said some real hum dingers and Jake agrees.

Have you ever had those moments when you feel so full, you think if I died right now, it would be ok? Tonight was like that. At our Church’s yearly Christmas Concert the orchestra and choirs were so beautiful, so remarkable they stirred me to worship in a way that I felt full of God’s wonder. I felt so glad to be alive. So thankful to still be here. And as they sang, "all is well" I thought, that’s what I want to say and feel and know whenever I am dying..."All is well..."

Then we filed out and into the rare rain and cold (I love it when it rains in San Clemente). I walked up stairs to pick up our boys and Conor shouted "Hi Mom! I got a leg!!" Then he held up a large well, leg part of what must have once been a big pinata. "I get to take it home!"

Over Rubios, burritos and chicken tacos with white sauce, we reminesced about our recent trip to Rancho Sordo Mudo and what we learned from the Mexican deaf children there. When I reminded the boys that we ought to just refer to our new friends as the students of RSM and do not need to keep calling them deaf kids, Conor quipped with a wink "yeah, we should, but they can’t hear us."

Then we drove around on one of our yearly traditions of watching all the Christmas lights. We found some wonderful ones this year, lit up reindeer, palm trees and twinkling wreaths. Jake’s comment was "Wow, these houses are all pampered!"

We ran today. Walked our crazy, loving wheaten terrier near the beach. I am so thankful, amazed and thrilled at how good I feel these days. I raced Conor up and down the beach trail. I get to stay up later and later (almost until 10 p.m. woo hoo) and I’m back to general house cleaning overall helping. In exactly 20 days from now we will celebrate my 3 years of surviving Cancer. One person wrote, the minute you are diagnosed you are a survivor. I like that. My day of counting starts then.

But, this is what I want you all to know my friends. Whatever may come, whatever life brings, KNOW that I have lived well. That I have had moments like tonight when my heart is so full that it overflows with tender love and gratitude. What else can one ask for?

I realized tonight that the drop that I want to add to this life is about God's Peace. I want to work for peace in this World. Within, with - out, with others, for others. Prince of Peace, Emmanuel you have come to make this world better. Mother Teresa teaches us to accept that small acts of love and mercy are important. To give in unknown ways to others may seem insignificant, like a drop of water against a tide but it is not. In the Kingdom of God it can and will become a flood that will change the planet we occupy.

Merry Christmas! 2007